Mammy behaving badly


I was staring into nothing. Lost in thought. Couldn’t get the words to fall magically into shape. My eyes fell on little Missy’s flicker. She had wanted a bike for her birthday but we came home with a flicker. Pink and rapid and free running. The kids were at school. It seemed to be waiting on me, to take it for a ride. Suddenly I was on it, flying round the kitchen. I whizzed past the fridge and the kitchen table. I flickered into the hallway, swinging by the sitting room, almost knocking myself senseless against the fireplace. The wheels had tangled themselves in the rug pile. Twisting and turning, I jumped back on, whizzed back down the hall, wiggling my bum and my legs towards the kitchen, sailed into the dining area and came face to face with a man glaring at me through the window. Oh God! I pulled the brakes. Jaw dropping moment. The man composed himself and shook a parcel in the air. The first of my Christmas shopping had arrived. I wanted to be swallowed up. I wanted to hide and crawl on all fours into a hole. Instead I shifted my hair back into place, nodded and pointed in the direction of the door. “Feck!” Red face. Humiliated, I pulled the door open. “Is your mother in?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. “Not today, but I can sign if you like…I know how to write.” I tried not to give at least thirty-five years away, but tried to look as grown up as I possibly could. Another eyebrow rose up as I took his pen and scribbled my signature in really grown up fashion. He checked the signature, handed me the parcel and walked off looking back, smiling suspiciously. Did he just skip out the gate? Behind the closed door I died slowly until I was on the floor laughing out loud…eyes closed…tears streaming…screaming with laughter. He will probably tell everyone about the home alone Mammy behaving badly. Went back to PC and wrote 2000 words. Not bad.


2 thoughts on “Mammy behaving badly

  1. What the hell..we all need little moments like this…great post..ELiza Keating

  2. ailialana says:

    HI Eliza…we certainly do…great for writers block! Thanks for stopping by.

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